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THE CLOWN 

A crowd was gathering beneath the tent  
The clown must keep them in a happy mood;  
No matter if the jokes are rough and rude;  
A circus is a place for merriment. 

And one must be quick-minded and invent  
New tricks and let no saddened thoughts intrude  
Nor let the public see him sigh or brood,  
But banish care and seem indifferent. 

There came a lull I saw him lean awhile  
Against a post and gaze with weary eyes  
As if he traveled backward many a mile....  
And though his body wore a gay disguise,  
For one brief space he played a tragic role  
There is no mask to hide a lonely soul. 

Margaret E. Bruner

If you have windows 95 and would like to try out ICQ go to: www.mirabilis.com/download.html to download the ICQ program. It is great fun and several chatters are now talking on a daily basis.

Thanks to KtheK 

3 Reasons to Feel Good 

We're Happy!  
When asked to rate their life satisfaction, most Americans said they're happy, according to the journal of Psychological Science. Previous research has revealed that the happiest people have close relationships, religious faith, are absorbed in their work, and actively pursue achievable goals. 

There are Fun Ways to Help You Live Longer  
Seeing a movie, reading a book, watching a show, or playing softball might increase your life span, according to one Swedish study. Attending or participating in cultural events helps people forget every day problems and this may help strengthen their immune systems. 

Sweets for the Heart  
You've heard about the possible heart-healthy benefits of red wine. Now scientists have discovered the same effects with chocolate. Compounds in chocolate (called phenolics) are thought to inhibit the clogging of arteries. In fact, in lab tests, the phenolics in chocolate performed as well as or better than those found in red wine. 

Taken from the May 19, 1997 issue of Woman's Day magazine 

"Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing." Phyllis Diller 

"If...you can't be a good example, then you'll just have to be a terrible warning." Catherine Aird 

"You know, I really don't think I needs buns of steel, I'd be happy with buns of cinnamon." Ellen Degeneres 

"They just caught the first female serial killer in Florida. Eight men. But she didn't kill them. She gained access to their homes, hid the remote controls, so they killed themselves." Elayne Boosler 

In those first discouraging days following the diagnosis of our illness, we were sure that life as we had known and enjoyed it was over. We felt that we would never again happiness. 

Soon we met others with the same illness. Many of them were happy, even joyous. Obviously they knew something we didn t or was it that they knew something we had forgotten? 

The fact is that illness doesn t change a single basic truth about happiness. As our friends reminded us, happiness is not an all-the-time thing or a forever thing, but a moment-to-moment thing. And it s up to us to recognize and savor each of those moments. They further reminded us that happiness doesn t come from the outside, but in all respects is an inside job. 

Time has passed and we have learned a great deal more about illness and ourselves. We can now affirm, from new experience, that happiness is not contingent on the state of our health, the state of our finances, or the attitudes and actions of others. We alone are responsible for it.  
J.S. Dorian 

When one door of happiness closes another opens, but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.................................Helen Keller

I m reprinting this for all the newbies who have joined the group in the last few months. Messes Bill is one special lady, and hopefully will return soon.. 

Heard y'all were interested in the story of my bungeephobia. enjoy! 

That's it, that's enough, I am about to tell you all about the real dangers of fibrofog!!!! :-) 

Friday:  
At the store, buying a tarpaulin to cover a mattress on the roof of the car. Said mattress being driven to Waterloo (approx 125 miles from Shwa, current hometown) to be delivered to a university student whose mother refused to take the mattress to him, in the hopes that he would not return to university this year. Some children do have 'em, eh? So, anyway, I bent over to look at the tarp selection. Glasses slip. I stand up, raise my arm to adjust glasses. Note Mr Bill raising his arm out of the corner of my eye. Does my fogged brain send me the message: "Move out of reach?" Oh no, it sends me the message "Hey, lookit that, his arm is about to collide with yours." Arms collide. I collapse in store aisle in pain. At home, Mr Bill and a local teen are outside while Mr Bill puts the tarp over the mattress. I join them, and stood (out of arms reach this time) with my back to Mr Bill while talking to the teen. Mr Bill is using a bungee cord to secure the tarp. My brain notices the hook and bungee cord approaching my face at high velocity. Does my fogged brain give me the all-important message: "Duck!"? Oh no, it sends me the message, "Hey, lookit that, what's that hook doing flying thru the air towards our eye?". Hook connects with face just below the cheekbone, knocking my glasses flying. I collapse on the driveway chanting "Owie owie owie.".  

Saturday:  
After delivering the mattress to Waterloo, we return home to bake a cake for friends of ours whose truck was stolen by a teen they'd taken into their home and treated as their own son for 8 months. Cake was decorated in a way to give them a laff (this part, at least, was highly successful - it involved candles in the shape of 2 army soldiers, an army truck and a tank, and featured - in my own handiwork - the international "No Weasel" symbol boldly in the middle of the cake - symbolizing no more weasels in their home and the army there to protect them). Cake has to bake for 1/2 hour. While the cake is baking, what better way to spend a half hour than by preparing a batch of homemade beer? Ya right. There's a gizmo that sends tap water at a high velocity into the glass jar for fermenting the beer, to clean it out quickly. Do you know what happens when Mr Bill tilts said glass jar while the gizmo is still attached to the tap? I notice a stream of water shooting towards my face. Does my fogged brain send me the urgent message: "Duck!" ? Oh no, it sends me the message "Hey, lookit that, Mr Bill is about to hit the SAME EYE that's already been hit TWICE this weekend!". Water connects with eye, in spite of glasses. I collapse on the basement floor, chanting "BIG owie, BIG owie, BIG owie.". 

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is the danger of fibrofog in full bloom. 

Mrs Bill .. just a font of foggy knowledge .... or is that soggy? ....

#1 Shine bathroom fixtures in a hurry. Use fabric-softener sheets to polish faucets and mirrors. (Note: I think they mean USED dryer sheets) 

#2 Save energy. Keep heat-producing appliances, lamps or televisions away from thermostat. 

#3 After a picnic, when storing cooler, wash and dry thoroughly. Sprinkle with baking soda. 

#4 If you ve broken a raw egg, pour table salt over gooky mess to absorb and wipe away. 

#5 When laundering clothes, add detergent first. Pouring detergent on top of clothing can cause certain fabrics to fade. 

#6 Prevent lint from sticking to dark clothing. Add 1 cup of white vinegar to the final rinse cycle when washing dark-colored items. 

#7 Apply spray starch to painted walls along hallways and stairways and to doors where fingerprints accumulate. The coating will resist marks better. 

#8 Remove white marks form wood table. Dip a damp cotton cloth in an equal amount of toothpaste and baking soda; rub until stain disappears. Buff spot with a dry cotton cloth because synthetic fabrics may scratch. 

#9 Use empty 2-liter plastic bottles to hold sacks of flour and sugar. Cut bottles to a height of about 6 inches, place sacks in the bottoms, and store in cupboard. This will keep sacks from falling over.

Sorry this is such a skimpy issue fellow chatter s. You don t have to send original items, just be sure to give credit where credit is due. Also you can sent me articles, hints, jokes, etc at anytime and I will put them in my HC file. Just be sure to send them privately.... edsmith@kalama.com  

margie your big head! editor??